In chapter 3, Nick Carraway runs into Tom Buchanan in New York City. Nick has come to have lunch with Gatsby at a Forty-second Street cellar when he spots Tom in the distance. Tom speaks aggressively as he comes towards Nick. Nick hears his questions as demands, saying twice that Tom "demanded" rather than "asked" a question. Tom asks (or demands of) Nick why he hasn't been around to visit, saying Daisy has been furious, and then he asks Nick how he's been.
In the midst of all this, Nick introduces Gatsby to Tom. Tom is too preoccupied to notice, completely blind to the idea he might have a rival for Daisy. In contrast, Gatsby looks embarrassed, and when Nick turns around as Tom is demanding to know why Nick has come so far to have lunch, Gatsby has disappeared.
It's significant in this scene that the overbearing Tom is completely oblivious to the man who is a rival for his wife.
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